Sorry, Ina Garten, Alton Brown, and Martha Stewart—no matter what Thanksgiving cooking hacks you have up your sleeve, Target has uncovered the true, failproof secret to having a perfectly golden bird this holiday season. One that involves absolutely zero trussing, brining, and basting. Or even preheating an oven.
Just head to the seasonal home decor, past Hearth & Hand's modern-farmhouse wonderland and just before the likely ravaged-and-empty display where Chrissy Teigen's Cravings line once sat, and pick up a glorious, gold-finished decorative roast turkey figurine. No, not a metal reproduction of a turkey in all its plumed glory; this is an upscale, trend-forward take on the ideal you desperately devote half the holiday cooking.
At roughly 2 pounds, the decorative accent—nay, objet d'art—is a little smaller than a football, making it more closely resemble a small roasted chicken or Cornish hen. But one look at the price tag confirms it: This here's a turkey! And in a textured, gold-toned finish that'll fit right in with your other kitchen's other brass-y accents. To truly appreciate what a headturner it is, you need to see this beaut in its natural habitat:
You might be taking all this in, wondering, but why would I want a fake turkey on my festive fall tablescape? To which, the devil's advocate might argue: Why are you calling it a tablescape? And why not?! Those pimply gourds have had their time. You've accumulated enough platters, signs, and pillows emblazoned with "" on them that it's starting to seem like subliminal messaging to join a cult meeting.
And, if you're going to collect tchotchkes to fill the table, they might as well be aspirational and inspirational, like this bird. Let its gleaming hue push you to carpe dinner this holiday season. Or display it proudly and order takeout. To thine own self be true and all that.
Decorative Turkey Figurine, $24.99; Target
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